My safe...space....my safe...space...

TRYing to be more open, to not live in them moment when it involves rejecting other people and their views. There is a lot to be learned from other people. There is...OHMIGOAWDgoat I've done this already which is how I got to where I am. Your views are BORING and for all the detail I am just being patient because I worked through where you are to get to where I am and...I'm being patient.

I once mocked a smart friend who relished having adult talk time with me. ME. I'm a fucking moron and regressed even so, but compared to a child I was adult talk. And I want kids.

So much to learn, and like the fuggin gym, it's not just learning, it's practicing and making thinking comfortable. Getting comfortable with uncomfortable but not just over-accepting...

Sigh.

I have feelings and they're as irrelevant as the ones I tell other people to ignore.

(no subject)

House is currently making me sad. I keep visiting and seeing some things are done, but it's never much more than the last time. Posting only because I took some pics.

Jordan called me the other day after I visited the place with Veronica. We just poked around; I guess they noted we had stopped by (which I like). What I didn't like was that he informed me the hvac guy came to hook up the a/c and noted that it was way underpowered and the system would not sufficiently cool my space. I took Scott's advice and checked that this wasn't just Jordan winging it - this was a drawn design by a hvac engineer. On the plus side, Jordan found this problem in December and has a guy coming over to figure out how to fix it Jan 4. I told him I can probably live without the AC here in December... Jordan also noted he'd "eat it" (this will cost him money, but he won't charge me) and...well yeah, duh on that one, but nice that he id'd the issue and addressed it on his own. Only, why it took until today rather than during the original plan I can't reasonably answer. I paid like 10-12k for the a/c, not a small venture.

He also was nervous I wouldn't like what he decided to do with paint without checking with me. Once again, I totally love it. I asked to paint the outside windows, because I paid the higher price to get real wood ones so painting a real color would show they off. He threw in the lentils and even went up and got the "gingerbread" / designy pieces at the top. It looks amazeballs. Every time he wings a decision I like the result.

I'm sad about this shit. It's been 2 years soon since I bought the place, and about 1.5 of that is waiting for this work to be done. The original estimate was 120 days. I was to move in before Halloween; I was so dejected I didn't even give out candy this year. Then T-day. Now xmas isn't looking realistic.

Pictures link, comments on them.
http://vicar.livejournal.com/photo/album/5403/?page=1

One curious experiment, I closed the door in the bathroom while work was going on - I couldn't believe how much the sound of saws was blocked by the solid wood door. V and I tested talking while the door was closed - the master bath? It's a vortex of personal privacy. There will be no need for "the poop bathroom" (as my boxing coach noted in his home) and I'm thrilled all around that I paid the price for solid wood doors. I liked the way they felt, but the sound dampening? Stunning.