(no subject)

[vicarz]

Death in general - people come out of the woodwork in shock, to garner attention to themselves, to lash out at those who react to the death, to elevate themselves by criticizing the dead or the speaking-living, or just in genuine grief. It happens every time, with most crying the recently departed was a saint, some lashing out to increase or cause grief and shock at the expense of those who are hurt by the death, and...well it just is predictable. I am afraid I feel it is never appropriate to lash out at the recently dead because those who cared about them are in a vulnerable state and there is no benefit to talking ill about the deceased. Shitty thing to do and shitty time to do it.

Dirk - I didn't know him well, more from many many casual encounters in clubs, parties, various freak days over the years - and often from mutual friends. That said, I think the best explanation I have of anything to do with him is to relate a conversation I had with him at a party:
I told him it killed me that I felt I did everything you're supposed to do, went to school, got a job, bought land...and was single. Dirk, on the other hand, was to the best of my knowledge wholly irresponsible, living on a couch surfing tour, and yet had bred children into this world. Without prompting, he volunteered "Man, that is fucked up!" I loved that moment and was impressed and happy he said that.

To the best of my knowledge, he had been accused of some heinous things in the way-back past but outlived all his detractors and no serious allegations were ever supported by evidence that I heard of. There were many reasons to disagree with his lifestyle choices but nothing he did was hidden or deceptive, nor did his actions affect anyone beyond their free will to be so affected. He was open and honest about what he wanted, what he did, and so far as I know he didn't do direct harm to anyone. The people that knew him liked him and trusted him.

But my opinion of him isn't important. It really isn't.