(no subject)

[vicarz]

bentrazor busted me for my modeling gig with the force. At least I had my shirt on for this one!

I looked at my salary the other day and was like "I make _that_ much?" Weird. Like so many other things, it looks good on paper, but the reality, living it, is different. It is consistent with the fact that my 2nd unit has been renovated and unoccupied for 3 months and I haven't really taken a major hit on my funds. Talking money with a few friends makes me realize that I'm...different. I forget other people don't choose the things (or not choose) or plan like I do. Is my level of frugality unusual, and if so, are there places or populations with whom my thriftiness is normal?

Happiness and other things are a tough balance for me right now - I guess they are for everyone but for some reason it's high up on my mind today. Someone recommended small changes in my life a little while ago - I wanted to renovate the fuck out of my bathroom when the house sold, but as it didn't sell that's not economically feasible anymore. However, after literally years of searching for a sick bargain I finally scored a couch. Every time I sit on the couch, oh in front of the absurd computer-tivo, with the relatively new to me lcd tv...I giggle a little. Dirty Jobs, Robot chicken, mythbusters, venture bros, and metalocalypse all boop up at my command and commercials are a was. All on my new bouncier very-long couch. It's a tiny little thing but it makes me happy.

Fitness and happiness are weird to me right now. This will sound LAME! But, and you can't start sentences with conjunctions, I'm really torn on stupid things like caffeine and losing weight. I have gone back to weight loss more seriously because it's been weeks and my weight flatlined. My current definition of me=good is washboard - not the lifting goals, not the running times, just the tummy. I've lost enough that my 29" pants fit without a moment's struggle, but I'm still 8-10 lbs away from unashamed to have you stare at my tummy when I bend over naked to pick up a penny of the floor. Problem is...why? Nobody I know cares about that tiny difference in my girlish figure. Nobody. If I were looking at me in mid "Should I tap that" between 133 and 146 there wouldn't be a 2nd thought. But flat tummy makes me happy...why? Problem is I'm one seriously cranky bitch when I don't eat lots of sugar and carbs. Still, even with my working out every day my weight is just stuck. I'm sure the alcohol doesn't help...but it does help my mood and it's cheaper than prozac and more dignified than therapy. So which is actually healthier for me - being cranky while I lose weight to get thin for no reason other than it makes me happy to have a defined tummy that nobody cares about, or being a little flubbered when I see the mirror every day but having a tummy full and mouth that tastes like sugar?

Same battle with caffeine and diet soda, only the soda seems to give me zits (at 40!?) so it's easier to argue against it. It's a funny math - good taste in my mouth right now, or a pimple 3 days from now. Compare this to not buying a car, gun, bigger tv...so I can retire comfortably in 15-25 years.

Everything costs about $500 at the cheapest. Gun, tv, laptop with so-so specs...and all of these things are big bumps up in quality at around the $1000 level. The electronics fall in price very steadily.

Comments

[djpsyche.livejournal.com]

The easiest question to answer is yes, you are unusually frugal. Our grandparents' generation were probably as frugal as you. With any luck, the next one along will be too.

[empressmiaka.livejournal.com]

Were you ever in the AF or did you just do the modeling? I like it!

And yes, you're unusually frugal. But that's a good thing since you are prepped unlike the rest of the US. lol