(no subject)
Oct. 17th, 2008 07:21 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarzAct as though you're living in the reality you want and it will (may) follow. The past couple of weeks I learned to appreciate someone about my age who consistently noted that they were exactly this many years old:
I've been on facebook a lot lately as the pics from Chile are popping up at random intervals, and to see what those folks are doing. I'm not enjoying facebook - it's more pokes, pics, and status comments than writing pieces - and I like writing. However, LJ isn't really much about writing anymore either, at least not much on my f-list. I guess that's the problem with everyday life - it's routine for long periods followed by unpredictable fascinating things. On LJ there is less writing, those that frequently write are more recording life (like a grocery list?) or posting links, pictures, or quizzes (comparable to facebook). Those that only post interesting thoughts don't write much.
Today's mini-resolution is that I'm going to, within reason, treat people as though they're acting the way I wish they acted. I'm going to try and feel as though things are as I want them - for a while this should be easy as I'm still very appreciative of the most basic things here. I'm going to stay prepared for the worst, but not act as though it's already in my lap, if that makes any sense.
Other mini-resolutions: less video game time, less tv, more reading, walk and metro more, make actual commitments to hang out with people instead of always letting it escape into the nebulous future, take more risks such as smiling or talking to people you don't know or don't know well. Stop scowling or being numb.
EDIT - work stuff, not good
So, before I left, our entire branch was under attack from a parallel branch and from above. The woman that made my life a living hell has been on a tear against many - I was only one. I reported for the record the incident where my old boss and she tore a new one into a coworker. A task force was started by the AA based on the high turnover and repeated accusations, so I risked all by making statements on the record of my experiences here. Well, we just got an announcement that the AA is now being reassigned as the head of a new "catfish division." The guy who was publicly berated has accepted a job at DHS (the 3rd or 4th of our group in the past year or so). It may seriously be time to move on - my hopes for this organization are all but quashed. I love this job, but how long will I be able to stand it here? In a meeting that took place in my absence, the dep admitted she was keeping records on employees with "performance concerns." When I asked her directly about the paper trail, she had said she wasn't keeping any such records - in public, when it was pointed out that the records were sitting on her desk, she admitted the inconsistent statements and responded nobody should be looking at her desk.
The catfish thing is funny. FDA covers all fish, is well experienced and equipped to do so, and there is no logical reason I am aware of to make a meat/poultry/egg division of USDA (FSIS) take over a particular type of fish. Sounds like a huge taxpayer waste based on a special interest to me, but hey, I just work here. Well, for now.
I've been on facebook a lot lately as the pics from Chile are popping up at random intervals, and to see what those folks are doing. I'm not enjoying facebook - it's more pokes, pics, and status comments than writing pieces - and I like writing. However, LJ isn't really much about writing anymore either, at least not much on my f-list. I guess that's the problem with everyday life - it's routine for long periods followed by unpredictable fascinating things. On LJ there is less writing, those that frequently write are more recording life (like a grocery list?) or posting links, pictures, or quizzes (comparable to facebook). Those that only post interesting thoughts don't write much.
Today's mini-resolution is that I'm going to, within reason, treat people as though they're acting the way I wish they acted. I'm going to try and feel as though things are as I want them - for a while this should be easy as I'm still very appreciative of the most basic things here. I'm going to stay prepared for the worst, but not act as though it's already in my lap, if that makes any sense.
Other mini-resolutions: less video game time, less tv, more reading, walk and metro more, make actual commitments to hang out with people instead of always letting it escape into the nebulous future, take more risks such as smiling or talking to people you don't know or don't know well. Stop scowling or being numb.
EDIT - work stuff, not good
So, before I left, our entire branch was under attack from a parallel branch and from above. The woman that made my life a living hell has been on a tear against many - I was only one. I reported for the record the incident where my old boss and she tore a new one into a coworker. A task force was started by the AA based on the high turnover and repeated accusations, so I risked all by making statements on the record of my experiences here. Well, we just got an announcement that the AA is now being reassigned as the head of a new "catfish division." The guy who was publicly berated has accepted a job at DHS (the 3rd or 4th of our group in the past year or so). It may seriously be time to move on - my hopes for this organization are all but quashed. I love this job, but how long will I be able to stand it here? In a meeting that took place in my absence, the dep admitted she was keeping records on employees with "performance concerns." When I asked her directly about the paper trail, she had said she wasn't keeping any such records - in public, when it was pointed out that the records were sitting on her desk, she admitted the inconsistent statements and responded nobody should be looking at her desk.
The catfish thing is funny. FDA covers all fish, is well experienced and equipped to do so, and there is no logical reason I am aware of to make a meat/poultry/egg division of USDA (FSIS) take over a particular type of fish. Sounds like a huge taxpayer waste based on a special interest to me, but hey, I just work here. Well, for now.
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no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 12:00 pm (UTC)At any rate, I see your point- and it drives home my own kind of 'personal heartache', in that I really haven't written like I've wanted to. At this point, I'd settle for just completing a short story (let alone get anything published). I just... I'll sit down, but the ideas, crappy or not, just don't come to me like they used to.
I'm beginning to wonder if there's something I did, you know, that 'turned off' that part of me that was open to taking malleable snippets of things on the edge of my perception and work them into a story.
no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 12:08 pm (UTC)I think we all lose the fire when we're busy with the full-time job of adult life. Ever feel like we work all week to afford the chores we need to do to manage the next work week?
(about to edit post for work stuff)
no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 12:28 pm (UTC)Nothing wrong with old video games. I'm still hankering to get my NES repaired to play what I've got. :)
no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 12:15 pm (UTC)[good news and bad news and good news (or bad news?)... larrys will be open all winter, because money is tight and the economy sucks, but he's going to start making cookies and cupcakes and other things *in addition to ice cream*]
no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 12:17 pm (UTC)Sunday, yes! Timeish?
no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 12:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 12:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 03:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 04:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 02:17 pm (UTC)(Change only happens *from within*......I believe in slowly but surely taking over the bureacracy & stuffing it full of freaks & geeks...much like the Baltimore PD...)
no subject
Date: 2008-10-17 02:27 pm (UTC)May explore this more...anyway we're overdue for foods. I know it's busy around this time of year but one of these weeks we should do Shirlington again.
On writing...
Date: 2008-10-18 12:19 am (UTC)Re: On writing...
Date: 2008-10-18 02:20 am (UTC)