vicarz | I can't make you like me, but I can resent you for not doing so.

We had a serious fight and it started to affect my workout. She got mad at me when I went out of town, which I think is uncalled for as there is no need to be jealous of family. My third had nothing but good things to say about me and how I appeared, but my moody main bitch was unforgiving. I suspected she had her own issues she was dealing with, or rather failing to deal with, which she was taking out on me - but foolishly I gave her opinions weight as I always do. I responded to her abuse, took her advice, and engaged in some less than healthy practices. I had to admit some of what I was doing was irresponsible - I was drinking too much (or too often), restaurants cost a lot, and candy is not a meal. Granted.

It kind of came to a head last night - I went to my conditioning class and felt very energetic at the start. The group of new very-fit people was motivating - my energy levels were off the chart and I went full-force. I was doing great until we switched over to mitt work, and as we slowed down I thought I was going to pass out. I had to sit down and duck my head down until the dizzy went away. After class she and I had a serious talk - she started with her lies again (though I note she was consistent with those lies, meaning I can't really trust her, ever). However, halfway through our discussion it was like she was speaking another language - in fact she was, for the reading had switched to kilograms. I fiddled with her underneath, and got her to read in lbs again - and suddenly I was at my target weight. Great - she's mad at me and broken until I stroke her backside...can anyone else see why this is problematic in a relationship based on trust? We had some make-up sex, and then hit the sack. I checked in with my third; the mirror was still kind to me. This AM she told me I'm still at my target weight - but can I really trust her now? Seriously, I'm not body dismorphic - I just have an unreliable scale.