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Aug. 19th, 2007 04:36 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarz7 responses to the apt, 2 from within 2 blocks. Seems rents are going up and my $1500 is on the low end! Nice to know the apt in as high demand as I hoped.
I was thinking about how I um...approach people. I don't know how to meet people. In a club I may look confident, but I'm afraid I only know how to socialize with existing friends or put myself on display. Approaching people is a skill I lack. My instinct should i want attention is to take off more clothes, or grow more hair. I cut the hair off based on "It was bait, and I didn't like what it was catching." I suppose running around showing off my meat is the same thing. I've been turned off by people who looked too hungry.
I'm not scared of hospitals like I used to be, but they also no longer smell like pee. It seems in the last 30 years they learned to clean with non-amonia. I got a late night call to find out my dad got worse after I visited. I visited again, and stayed with him playing the role of entertainment until he was falling asleep. Speaking of, why am I up at 4am? He's hooked up to monitors, one of which is checking his oxygen level. When he got worse, they put him on a machine that pushes air into the lungs with a mask that forms a seal over the nose and mouth. In short, my dad is doing a great Christopher Reeves imitation. I gave him the www.giantmicrobes.com plushie brain cell - I told him he didn't have pneumonia long enough for me to get that toy yet. He was amused. I didn't have any great stories to share, but I did read him sections out of the deposition I had completed to show the idiocy I deal with at work. He noted it sounded like daytime court shows where the person on the stand is obviously lying - not a bad comparison. I also told him that story about the atheist who dies and finds out god created life out of sheer boredom in a suicide attempt that continues to this day. Yeah, I really suck for entertainment.
I couldn't help but notice that the machines are the only reason he is alive at all right now, but while he is expected to recover fine, it is very obvious how mortal he is today. Without a machine to monitor his oxygen level and the other machine forcing a high concentration of oxygen into his lungs he'd be dead right now. Right now. He had a drink of juice while I was there, and went from 95% oxygen to 75% and lower. That only took a minute or less. Nurses do good things, though right now I have a strong bias for the ones who speak english well. When you can hardly breathe and have a mask over your face it's hard enough to communicate. Naruto was on the tv, the small tv that swings out to the bed like a dentists x-ray machine.
Came home, had pbj and binged on mediocre chocolate while watching part of kung fu hustle. Getting sick is hard, really hard, sometimes. Mortality kind of sucks, but it's probably better than the alternative.
I was thinking about how I um...approach people. I don't know how to meet people. In a club I may look confident, but I'm afraid I only know how to socialize with existing friends or put myself on display. Approaching people is a skill I lack. My instinct should i want attention is to take off more clothes, or grow more hair. I cut the hair off based on "It was bait, and I didn't like what it was catching." I suppose running around showing off my meat is the same thing. I've been turned off by people who looked too hungry.
I'm not scared of hospitals like I used to be, but they also no longer smell like pee. It seems in the last 30 years they learned to clean with non-amonia. I got a late night call to find out my dad got worse after I visited. I visited again, and stayed with him playing the role of entertainment until he was falling asleep. Speaking of, why am I up at 4am? He's hooked up to monitors, one of which is checking his oxygen level. When he got worse, they put him on a machine that pushes air into the lungs with a mask that forms a seal over the nose and mouth. In short, my dad is doing a great Christopher Reeves imitation. I gave him the www.giantmicrobes.com plushie brain cell - I told him he didn't have pneumonia long enough for me to get that toy yet. He was amused. I didn't have any great stories to share, but I did read him sections out of the deposition I had completed to show the idiocy I deal with at work. He noted it sounded like daytime court shows where the person on the stand is obviously lying - not a bad comparison. I also told him that story about the atheist who dies and finds out god created life out of sheer boredom in a suicide attempt that continues to this day. Yeah, I really suck for entertainment.
I couldn't help but notice that the machines are the only reason he is alive at all right now, but while he is expected to recover fine, it is very obvious how mortal he is today. Without a machine to monitor his oxygen level and the other machine forcing a high concentration of oxygen into his lungs he'd be dead right now. Right now. He had a drink of juice while I was there, and went from 95% oxygen to 75% and lower. That only took a minute or less. Nurses do good things, though right now I have a strong bias for the ones who speak english well. When you can hardly breathe and have a mask over your face it's hard enough to communicate. Naruto was on the tv, the small tv that swings out to the bed like a dentists x-ray machine.
Came home, had pbj and binged on mediocre chocolate while watching part of kung fu hustle. Getting sick is hard, really hard, sometimes. Mortality kind of sucks, but it's probably better than the alternative.
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Date: 2007-08-19 11:01 am (UTC)-i hope all is well with your dad.
-why on earth are you watching bad anime on cartoon network>?>?
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Date: 2007-08-19 12:36 pm (UTC)I love bad anime on cartoon network, but this was playing on the few cable channels they had in the hospital.
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Date: 2007-08-19 12:40 pm (UTC)(I can say this coz you got your moose and you got your man so I can "get away with flattery)
no subject
Date: 2007-08-20 12:58 am (UTC)As for you not having the ability to approach people your biggest problem is lack of confidence in yourself. You always have to prove yourself to yourself. You don't really have to do that because you should have already proved yourself with all that you've done.
My family played music & read books to me while I was in the coma. That's something you might want to try. I don't know if it will work for your dad, but they say it probably worked for me & I was in the coma.
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Date: 2007-08-20 10:01 am (UTC)Hanging with my dad, took my laptop to him so he could play his cds and watch some movies during god-awful daytime tv.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-21 01:21 am (UTC)For someone that doesn't believe in god you shouldn't say god aweful. ;P I'm sure your dad appreciates the music & tv, but he appreciates the time you spend more. It's great that you're there for him & it will help him get better.
no subject
Date: 2007-08-20 12:57 pm (UTC)