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Dec. 21st, 2005 07:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarzDidn't sleep for shit last night. I was going to NAP AT WORK TODAY ON THE CLOCK MUDDAFUGGA but my office-mate is here. I'm friggin weary.
Dilemma: the NLRB has an EEO 14 open and the same guy who encouraged me to apply to the last job is encouraging me to apply to this one. He notes that there isn't much EEO work yet the department is larger than you might expect. This means easy work to me, from a group that already knows me. So, an easy GS-14 at a great location. Drawbacks - most EEO is BS, it's a potential dead-end career-wise, lots of nut-jobs in EEO, that steaming cunt who got the job I wanted in HR is there and based on that I didn't apply for the GS-13 lateral that would have done me good. I carry a grudge even if I am civil in person. It sounds like a good short-term idea, bad long-term idea.
I got my hair cut last night and had a disturbing conversation with my man. As always, he told me about his stunning sex ventures, but this time with a twist. Remember I was considering going out with this guy, and did a 180 when on the first mention of hanging out he was already speaking about my staying as a given. So he told me about some ventures, the more disturbing one was the sculpted ukrainian 3-some where the perfect-abs man kept trying to tear or take off his condom. When my man was done with him, the guy asked if he was "sick," he said no, and the guy turned the condom inside-out and crammed it inside himself. People. HIV is hardly the only disease out there, and condoms only stop some diseases some of the time. It's like herpes or warts don't count anymore? Next thing, my guy starts talking to me about weight as I work out more than he does, and he notes that over the last few months he has lost 20 or so lbs w/o meaning to. Sonofa... I politely note that "were it me, I might check with a doctor to see if anything is up, coz that's a lot with no reason." He then probes his own recent past and why he might have lost...it's the same excuse hunting you hear people do about weight gain. I don't push the scary doctor thing much, just give him the info and hope he works with it. I leave a little more sad.
The gym was a little rude to me yesterday, but gyms are like that when you neglect them during finals. I was rude back. Now the gym gives me such a hard-on, I want every bit of the pain. I tore my shit up yesterday, finding good form a real challenge. I wanted to reach, I wanted to hurt, I wanted to master, I wanted to grow. I love to feel pain and laugh at it, push for more. You can do anything if you overcome pain - you can fucking reach into fire. And injure yourself. Tonight is boxing.
Dilemma: the NLRB has an EEO 14 open and the same guy who encouraged me to apply to the last job is encouraging me to apply to this one. He notes that there isn't much EEO work yet the department is larger than you might expect. This means easy work to me, from a group that already knows me. So, an easy GS-14 at a great location. Drawbacks - most EEO is BS, it's a potential dead-end career-wise, lots of nut-jobs in EEO, that steaming cunt who got the job I wanted in HR is there and based on that I didn't apply for the GS-13 lateral that would have done me good. I carry a grudge even if I am civil in person. It sounds like a good short-term idea, bad long-term idea.
I got my hair cut last night and had a disturbing conversation with my man. As always, he told me about his stunning sex ventures, but this time with a twist. Remember I was considering going out with this guy, and did a 180 when on the first mention of hanging out he was already speaking about my staying as a given. So he told me about some ventures, the more disturbing one was the sculpted ukrainian 3-some where the perfect-abs man kept trying to tear or take off his condom. When my man was done with him, the guy asked if he was "sick," he said no, and the guy turned the condom inside-out and crammed it inside himself. People. HIV is hardly the only disease out there, and condoms only stop some diseases some of the time. It's like herpes or warts don't count anymore? Next thing, my guy starts talking to me about weight as I work out more than he does, and he notes that over the last few months he has lost 20 or so lbs w/o meaning to. Sonofa... I politely note that "were it me, I might check with a doctor to see if anything is up, coz that's a lot with no reason." He then probes his own recent past and why he might have lost...it's the same excuse hunting you hear people do about weight gain. I don't push the scary doctor thing much, just give him the info and hope he works with it. I leave a little more sad.
The gym was a little rude to me yesterday, but gyms are like that when you neglect them during finals. I was rude back. Now the gym gives me such a hard-on, I want every bit of the pain. I tore my shit up yesterday, finding good form a real challenge. I wanted to reach, I wanted to hurt, I wanted to master, I wanted to grow. I love to feel pain and laugh at it, push for more. You can do anything if you overcome pain - you can fucking reach into fire. And injure yourself. Tonight is boxing.
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Date: 2005-12-21 01:02 pm (UTC)*huge naughty grin* You know...That's very, very similar to something I've expressed to my Dom. LOL
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Date: 2005-12-21 01:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-12-21 02:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-12-21 01:46 pm (UTC)*zonk*
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Date: 2005-12-21 08:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-12-21 10:02 pm (UTC)[punches Jose in the arm]
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Date: 2005-12-22 06:24 am (UTC)and now I feel pretty...
Date: 2005-12-22 12:03 pm (UTC)