(no subject)

[vicarz]

I've changed. I'm seeing that my vacation is almost over, and I can't avoid the fact that I've worked, worked out, played, and otherwise been 100% productive the entire time. I installed lights, cleaned house, worked out like a mudda, played a bunch, hung out with many friends, spent a small honda in restaurants and bars, and otherwise run myself ragged when I wasn't working on school work. I did not sleep much, watch movies, drink much, have a party, discipline the primate (much), watch tv, or perhaps most importantly, play video games. I used to blow off people and lovers for video games, now I'm too busy for them? Who have I become, this weirdo who wishes he'd win the lottery so he could get more gym time and better food? Well - tonight I am slacking. I have my gym clothes and could do leg work with cardio tonight...but I'm not going to. I'm taking a vacation today, even from the gym. I'm going to go home and do nothing. Or eat out with a friend, watch a dvd, blow up aliens, but probably nothing.

I will have to enjoy the irony of being a bi who only dates girls and a slacker who is always engaged in activities. Bugger. No wait, I don't really date girls much either...fuck you, Savage!

Speaking of hot 18 year olds...when did they start looking like kids to me? I make all the crude comments and jokes, but when faced with a far younger person the attraction isn't there - even when it's legal. I've slipped more into recognizing the attractiveness, but not necessarily wanting to wrap my lips around it like a popsicle. Is the moral decay just an identity rather than a behavior pattern? Who do I have to bang to be a horrid heathen again? Oi.

I thought about having a party on Friday 8/19, the last Fri before school starts, but decided since I'm having windows installed Thur 8/18 it's probably a bad idea. I may be cleaning and painting/staining.

No nation for me tonight - last time there was a live show I didn't enjoy the night.

Comments

[seth6666.livejournal.com]

doesn't matter. you're coming to see me play next thursday. and you will dance and like it. fukker.

-S

[tehcas.livejournal.com]

I dunno, but maybe its something in the water. Some of them look young. They can be 20's and look like jailbait. Or BE jailbait and look legal.
I can't say i havnt thought that many times before when looking at pictures of them. It's almost enough to put you off porn in disgust of how many "children" are doing it. Almost. But not quite.

[lilu22.livejournal.com]

You didn't have fun? Well, I was glad you were there, even if we didn't hang out a lot.

[ex-means947.livejournal.com]

you know, i've been thinking about this (mostly because i'm not the only one). What makes bi's identify as bi's when they're dating mostly one sex (not gender... gender we know is a construct). I.e, the 'bi' girl I had a crush on in school mostly dates women, & the 'bi' guy I knew from school mostly dates men (but was celibate, & is currently finally in love again... with a man). I've also dated two 'bi' women lately who mostly dated women.

some of my fiction chronicles the 'bi' struggle. Seriously, since orientation is such an identity-issue in this country, we're fucked before we're even fucking.

I'm just empathizing. More later...

[vicar.livejournal.com]

For many people, bi is a temporary identity. It takes a while to sort things out in a society that is pushing so hard for hetero behavior. After facing discrimination from both sides of the fence, it's hard not to take off and be an identity zealot. Even if it isn't who you are, you feel obligated to defend the role as an option for others, and it's easier to defend the role as a group member.

Or I'm talking out of my caboose.