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Feb. 21st, 2005 07:01 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarzI know I've done a few religious rants lately, but I've been stuck in a series of serious debates on the subject. I can't say that I understand much about the nature of god, but one series of logical exchanges has forced me to admit one fact - zombies prove that god exists.
I mean zombies just make no fucking sense. You could sort of imagine how they kept going when they were just slow zombies. Perhaps a virus makes people change so drastically that they turn into zombies, moving slow but having the advantage of sludging their blood. The slow motion seems a negative side effect to a positive trait - they are unlikely to bleed to death with either super-clotting properties in the blood or simply slower blood flow. They seemed to do the impossible, but you could imagine how this was possible.
One thing I never understood was the vast numbers that turned into zombies. I mean if zombies are supposed to be eating people, how do they wind up turning so many others into zombies? One minute you see your former lover being pac-man chomped on by a hoard of zombies - then the bastard comes back to haunt you as a shell of his former self. What, is a non-zombie only a tasty treat to a zombie for the first couple of bites? And how do they keep finding us - I mean at least now we've seen people fake being zombies and get away with it, but then if zombies can see and recognize non-zombies, AND if zombies pursue non-zombies (a good disease-spreading trait), why can't they perform remedial tasks like turning doorknobs?
Now they have fast zombies. This just makes no sense at all. I mean the disease model of zombies seems to really be taking hold, but the idea that zombies just keep going and going...they lose limbs, major organs, and somehow react the same as a very energetic non-zombie. How is this possible? The exchange of oxygen that we know of as life simply does not support any of the activities we see zombies engaged in today. In short, they are impossible by every known type of science. This is before you go into the non-zombie detection and food requirements. Logic is blown out the window - zombies don't eat dogs or rats?
In short, zombies prove the existence of god. Now the only problem seems to be proving the existence of zombies...
I mean zombies just make no fucking sense. You could sort of imagine how they kept going when they were just slow zombies. Perhaps a virus makes people change so drastically that they turn into zombies, moving slow but having the advantage of sludging their blood. The slow motion seems a negative side effect to a positive trait - they are unlikely to bleed to death with either super-clotting properties in the blood or simply slower blood flow. They seemed to do the impossible, but you could imagine how this was possible.
One thing I never understood was the vast numbers that turned into zombies. I mean if zombies are supposed to be eating people, how do they wind up turning so many others into zombies? One minute you see your former lover being pac-man chomped on by a hoard of zombies - then the bastard comes back to haunt you as a shell of his former self. What, is a non-zombie only a tasty treat to a zombie for the first couple of bites? And how do they keep finding us - I mean at least now we've seen people fake being zombies and get away with it, but then if zombies can see and recognize non-zombies, AND if zombies pursue non-zombies (a good disease-spreading trait), why can't they perform remedial tasks like turning doorknobs?
Now they have fast zombies. This just makes no sense at all. I mean the disease model of zombies seems to really be taking hold, but the idea that zombies just keep going and going...they lose limbs, major organs, and somehow react the same as a very energetic non-zombie. How is this possible? The exchange of oxygen that we know of as life simply does not support any of the activities we see zombies engaged in today. In short, they are impossible by every known type of science. This is before you go into the non-zombie detection and food requirements. Logic is blown out the window - zombies don't eat dogs or rats?
In short, zombies prove the existence of god. Now the only problem seems to be proving the existence of zombies...
