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Lament on a few subjects
Feb. 3rd, 2015 09:28 amI just faced my first setback - a minor one I hope. I got the brace off and everything has felt normal - in fact the damn brace was causing more difficulty than help and without it on I rarely limp.
Over the weekend I was, perhaps, a bit reckless. Now I feel a pain, joint pain, way up on the inside of the hip. I feel fine until there is any kind of movement in the hip, particularly out (like bad-girls) and that motion is extremely weak. I noticed this before PT yesterday, more so afterwards, and I tried to do the exercises we did not do in PT and it hurt too much to (reasonably) continue.
I'm worried I won't be able to do my exercises today. I'll do what doesn't hurt. For the first time I'm really on the verge of a pain killer. Each time I get up I take a few steps to get moving, and I'm limping as the joint just hurts. Last night I slept on one side with -a pillow in between my legs- as prescribed by my PT. No seriously.
Non-labia news:
I'm insane. Life is happy, work is slow, but I'm having major focus problems. The big mental issue seems to be I'm feeling overwhelmed. I've remastered my calendar a little bit, shrunk multiple email inboxes, and made organized piles of things that need doing.
But it feels like too much all at once. Taxes are a mountain this year, in the office all I seem to do are tiny tasks while legal research and my large brief all sit by the wayside (a hearing outline is mostly done, however, but working on it for more than an hour is an elusive concept), I haven't figured out the DC permit process (it seems a catch 22, you need the COO to get a business license, but the license to be granted a COO - and they don't answer their phones and send C&P email responses)...all the things are easily manageable, yet I feel overwhelmed. Making investigative phone calls seem like the hardest thing in the world. "Why is the bar writing me claiming I didn't give them a tax id number when I know I returned those forms?" "How is it possible I missed 2 utility bills for my house - I _never_ miss payments, and on one I wrote "PAID" when my records show it wasn't!?"
I keep stalling - this post is stalling for emotional need. I think if I just had one more coffee I'd be energized. Just make it to lunch and I can take a nap and might wake up smarter. Maybe tomorrow I'll be more focused, just sleep tonight and it'll work itself out. But it keeps not being that day, that hour, that perfect level of stimulant. Chemicals and naps are not making me functional.
Over the weekend I was, perhaps, a bit reckless. Now I feel a pain, joint pain, way up on the inside of the hip. I feel fine until there is any kind of movement in the hip, particularly out (like bad-girls) and that motion is extremely weak. I noticed this before PT yesterday, more so afterwards, and I tried to do the exercises we did not do in PT and it hurt too much to (reasonably) continue.
I'm worried I won't be able to do my exercises today. I'll do what doesn't hurt. For the first time I'm really on the verge of a pain killer. Each time I get up I take a few steps to get moving, and I'm limping as the joint just hurts. Last night I slept on one side with -a pillow in between my legs- as prescribed by my PT. No seriously.
Non-labia news:
I'm insane. Life is happy, work is slow, but I'm having major focus problems. The big mental issue seems to be I'm feeling overwhelmed. I've remastered my calendar a little bit, shrunk multiple email inboxes, and made organized piles of things that need doing.
But it feels like too much all at once. Taxes are a mountain this year, in the office all I seem to do are tiny tasks while legal research and my large brief all sit by the wayside (a hearing outline is mostly done, however, but working on it for more than an hour is an elusive concept), I haven't figured out the DC permit process (it seems a catch 22, you need the COO to get a business license, but the license to be granted a COO - and they don't answer their phones and send C&P email responses)...all the things are easily manageable, yet I feel overwhelmed. Making investigative phone calls seem like the hardest thing in the world. "Why is the bar writing me claiming I didn't give them a tax id number when I know I returned those forms?" "How is it possible I missed 2 utility bills for my house - I _never_ miss payments, and on one I wrote "PAID" when my records show it wasn't!?"
I keep stalling - this post is stalling for emotional need. I think if I just had one more coffee I'd be energized. Just make it to lunch and I can take a nap and might wake up smarter. Maybe tomorrow I'll be more focused, just sleep tonight and it'll work itself out. But it keeps not being that day, that hour, that perfect level of stimulant. Chemicals and naps are not making me functional.
