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Spiritual crisis...I mean material.
Apr. 24th, 2012 09:09 amYesterday I was excited because of my ability and fun doing cleans. Today I'm realizing I was and am really sore. I have partially happy because I'm so much stronger than the last time I did them that I was able to do much more weight with much better form (plus I studied and learned form a lot more). Today I'm more full of ow (though I may be allergey-ish or fighting a cold as well - jury is out).
I REALLY like the idea of olympic lifting. It's really hard to just figure that out from books and online with my own physical ventures, but I have made some progress and...man it's fun. Lifting can be slow and painful, but this throwing stuff around - once I get over my own personal terror - is thrilling. No, because of my terror - throwing around big weights. Wow. That's fucking fun.
So I had a roundabout conversation with a big boss which has made me hmm my career again. Currently my lack of aspiration is to be a really good technician (lawyerish version) and hopefully have an easy job in which I can coast, but pays well and isn't so easy I get bored. He has higher career aspirations, much, and has a hard-working orientation (I blame his parents, and he seems to be trying to instill the same thing in his son). We talked issues, and I dodged again by talking about reaching a level of "fluency in my current position."
I can't put him off forever - he will likely move up and want people to follow whom he d can rely on (not personal loyalty per se, but skill, ethics, and personal integrity upon which he can rely). Is my lazy career goal something I will outgrow, or is it a higher level not to be competitive? Is it ok to aspire to the role of master technician rather than influencer of people?
Sigh. I'm trying to make big-people decisions in many areas of my life. The more I think about it, the more I want to default to my apple-jacks level decisions (yummy now and ignore the cuts in the roof of my mouth). It's ok to accept that feeling, even give that feeling a buffer to be satiated, but I know I need to think - even if it's not a rush.
Do I want that path? Which path is more mature? Which is better for me, and in what timeframe?
I'm not unhappy that these are the things I have to worry about, by the way.
I REALLY like the idea of olympic lifting. It's really hard to just figure that out from books and online with my own physical ventures, but I have made some progress and...man it's fun. Lifting can be slow and painful, but this throwing stuff around - once I get over my own personal terror - is thrilling. No, because of my terror - throwing around big weights. Wow. That's fucking fun.
So I had a roundabout conversation with a big boss which has made me hmm my career again. Currently my lack of aspiration is to be a really good technician (lawyerish version) and hopefully have an easy job in which I can coast, but pays well and isn't so easy I get bored. He has higher career aspirations, much, and has a hard-working orientation (I blame his parents, and he seems to be trying to instill the same thing in his son). We talked issues, and I dodged again by talking about reaching a level of "fluency in my current position."
I can't put him off forever - he will likely move up and want people to follow whom he d can rely on (not personal loyalty per se, but skill, ethics, and personal integrity upon which he can rely). Is my lazy career goal something I will outgrow, or is it a higher level not to be competitive? Is it ok to aspire to the role of master technician rather than influencer of people?
Sigh. I'm trying to make big-people decisions in many areas of my life. The more I think about it, the more I want to default to my apple-jacks level decisions (yummy now and ignore the cuts in the roof of my mouth). It's ok to accept that feeling, even give that feeling a buffer to be satiated, but I know I need to think - even if it's not a rush.
Do I want that path? Which path is more mature? Which is better for me, and in what timeframe?
I'm not unhappy that these are the things I have to worry about, by the way.
