I'm not joking (at work)
Nov. 4th, 2016 07:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
When I left the DOL-OFCCP, I was persecuted by a raging twatwaffle. I know I played a role in that, but even reflecting back some of the objective facts do show something was not quite right (such as insisting against my advice I take performance-based action, then overriding it because "it would look wrong for a white man to take action against a black woman)," giving out performance awards directly (while again, shadow having me give the bad news as if it was from me). I was pretty down on things when I left.
But I went to unnamed Agency, and while I was terrified when I saw how much discipline they issued over things that were not even considered misconduct in DOL, my hard work was rewarded and I adapted to the culture easily. I turned back into a happy and patriotic employee. Then I had another abusive twatwaffle and downturn...but it was never all bad, and I turned that around as well.
At unnamed Agency, I met an old coworker, frankly one I had an inappropriate crush on at DOL (I was a manager, she was my co-manager's subordinate). Now there was no barrier, but I was used to the barrier so I sort of maintained distance. Still, we were friends and more frank than average coworkers. I hung out with her when I worked in Beltsville, and she told me horrible stories about coworkers I liked and considered friends - things which, if true, would make me not want to be friends with them. Still, while I knew and trusted her, I knew and trusted the others. Lacking details I decided "not to decide" whether my friend was telling the truth or if my other friends were twatwaffles. Even so, my friend stayed negative, avoided people, and kind of spiraled into defensiveness and negativity until she left unnamed Agency. Her work and attendance suffered. Persecuted or not, she was not a good employee when she left. I got a rumble that she didn't do well in her new job either...
And...in that is my mystery. I work against mostly fuckups, people who disappear into the EEO complaint process routinely, moving from trying to work for reward to fighting perceived wrongs via the complaint system, withholding work, and looking for attacks. I work with the fuckups who don't believe they were discriminated against, but have no problem filing complaints hoping to hit the "eeo lottery" of rewards for technical violations or missing files etc. Understand - I'm the first to say there is discrimination, but sadly the people I see using the process -largely- are not victims 98% of the time (even the ones who believe they are vs. lying). So, I'm not sure I'm that different - I went negative and while I faced some problems - was it discrimination? If so, how much was that, and how much other things?
Most importantly - how did I get out of that mindset? How did I go from negative to so happy today? Why didn't my friend who went from the same environment to a similar environment? I lost touch with her when she left this job and withdrew from me (mostly).
If there is a most-valuable-thing I can do from my position - it's not defending taxpayers against the frivolous claims or even shutting down the abuse of the system. It's finding a way to flip the switch on people who have gone to a perspective of negativity and defensiveness into working for good, for a team, for the US of A, for their own ethics ... making things instead of defending and attacking perceived threats. That's the mystery I'd like to solve, and then communicate with behavioral results.
Those 1/10 or 1/100 freakshows cost a fortune in the bureaucracies I see.
However if I could get the right people using the system I could perhaps do more good than that. Every study that looks at resume or loan applications with sex/race information on them finds bias in how the same facts are rated based on the race/sex of the named applicant. I fear that the ninnies trying to score undeserved goods, thieves who intend to abuse the process, are not only causing direct harm via wasted resources - but preventing people who could file substantive claims, the kind that could lead to institutional change, from using the process as it was designed.
But I went to unnamed Agency, and while I was terrified when I saw how much discipline they issued over things that were not even considered misconduct in DOL, my hard work was rewarded and I adapted to the culture easily. I turned back into a happy and patriotic employee. Then I had another abusive twatwaffle and downturn...but it was never all bad, and I turned that around as well.
At unnamed Agency, I met an old coworker, frankly one I had an inappropriate crush on at DOL (I was a manager, she was my co-manager's subordinate). Now there was no barrier, but I was used to the barrier so I sort of maintained distance. Still, we were friends and more frank than average coworkers. I hung out with her when I worked in Beltsville, and she told me horrible stories about coworkers I liked and considered friends - things which, if true, would make me not want to be friends with them. Still, while I knew and trusted her, I knew and trusted the others. Lacking details I decided "not to decide" whether my friend was telling the truth or if my other friends were twatwaffles. Even so, my friend stayed negative, avoided people, and kind of spiraled into defensiveness and negativity until she left unnamed Agency. Her work and attendance suffered. Persecuted or not, she was not a good employee when she left. I got a rumble that she didn't do well in her new job either...
And...in that is my mystery. I work against mostly fuckups, people who disappear into the EEO complaint process routinely, moving from trying to work for reward to fighting perceived wrongs via the complaint system, withholding work, and looking for attacks. I work with the fuckups who don't believe they were discriminated against, but have no problem filing complaints hoping to hit the "eeo lottery" of rewards for technical violations or missing files etc. Understand - I'm the first to say there is discrimination, but sadly the people I see using the process -largely- are not victims 98% of the time (even the ones who believe they are vs. lying). So, I'm not sure I'm that different - I went negative and while I faced some problems - was it discrimination? If so, how much was that, and how much other things?
Most importantly - how did I get out of that mindset? How did I go from negative to so happy today? Why didn't my friend who went from the same environment to a similar environment? I lost touch with her when she left this job and withdrew from me (mostly).
If there is a most-valuable-thing I can do from my position - it's not defending taxpayers against the frivolous claims or even shutting down the abuse of the system. It's finding a way to flip the switch on people who have gone to a perspective of negativity and defensiveness into working for good, for a team, for the US of A, for their own ethics ... making things instead of defending and attacking perceived threats. That's the mystery I'd like to solve, and then communicate with behavioral results.
Those 1/10 or 1/100 freakshows cost a fortune in the bureaucracies I see.
However if I could get the right people using the system I could perhaps do more good than that. Every study that looks at resume or loan applications with sex/race information on them finds bias in how the same facts are rated based on the race/sex of the named applicant. I fear that the ninnies trying to score undeserved goods, thieves who intend to abuse the process, are not only causing direct harm via wasted resources - but preventing people who could file substantive claims, the kind that could lead to institutional change, from using the process as it was designed.
no subject
Date: 2016-11-04 01:13 pm (UTC)That would be pretty amazing. On top of the cost of processing these cases, the investment in people that is lost because they walk away disenfranchised, convinced they were wronged, must be staggering.
no subject
Date: 2016-11-04 01:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-11-04 06:26 pm (UTC)MD110, mixed cases aside, means you can win, but you'll stay in the same organization. That's like fighting to have your name on the deed on a house you don't want. You wanted out.
> How did I go from negative to so happy today?
you're sticking your dick in non-crazy and that works wonders for putting work bullshit in perspective
> Why didn't my friend who went from the same environment to a similar environment?
probably a lack of the aforementioned
no subject
Date: 2016-11-04 06:32 pm (UTC)Yup, remedies are make-whole, but many people choose that course.