(no subject)
Sep. 6th, 2016 06:17 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarzOooooooh.
I forgot that when I started this job, my goal was to make it easy. I always thought I was front-loading, taking on the hard work first (like vegetables), so that later I could coast and reap the rewards of my efforts (like candy). I had pieces of this plan, such as having a list of case law cites and sample motions that I could plop down and easily issue in new cases with little effort. I saw a day where my work would take hours and I could coast - I worked hard for my goal of not working hard.
Recently I had my easiest case ever. It wasn’t perfect, but putting on the generally undisputed facts was easy. Still, I worked on it for days, hours off the clock, and still had to do high-stress marathons in the field. It wasn’t easy - easier than other cases, but it was still a challenge for me. I had to work hard.
The past couple weeks I worked on a MSJ and response to PFR way ahead of deadlines. For possibly the first time, I did that thing where you do the work so far in advance you can not look at it for a day, and then look at it (to see if I still like it - King Crimson) and see all the errors I couldn’t see when I had been so deeply immersed in the work. I got to make nominal settlement offers knowing the filing was ready in my pocket. I also did a good job - I didn’t pull an old sample and put the new facts in - I started from scratch. I pulled and checked case cites, ensuring old ones were current and pulling new ones from recent issuances by the administrative body I’m resenting the case to. This new filing may be a sample later, but this time I took my developed knowledge and made it good from the start.
I no longer see the end game where my job is easy. Easy now means I know what I’m doing and am confident, and may take shortcuts on the details if forced to, but not without knowing the risks of each. Easy means confident, but not really easy. I don’t mind either. Working hard feels good - it’s the strangest thing.
Or it’s easy? People think I’m respectable and disciplined because I always go t the gym. But I suck at the gym - sure, I get stronger in between injuries. But remember I was going to do cardio? I am still not doing cardo. When I go and lift, I just lift, then stop. Lift, then stop. No cardio, no trudging, no elliptical when I’m done, and no crossfit hoppity dances in between lifts. Pick up. Put down. Go home. It’s also fun - I enjoy being stronger than the person beside me, and I enjoy being respectable with good form next to very strong people. It’s not disciplined that I go - it’s momentum and the fact I enjoy it. It’s easy.
What is lazy?
I forgot that when I started this job, my goal was to make it easy. I always thought I was front-loading, taking on the hard work first (like vegetables), so that later I could coast and reap the rewards of my efforts (like candy). I had pieces of this plan, such as having a list of case law cites and sample motions that I could plop down and easily issue in new cases with little effort. I saw a day where my work would take hours and I could coast - I worked hard for my goal of not working hard.
Recently I had my easiest case ever. It wasn’t perfect, but putting on the generally undisputed facts was easy. Still, I worked on it for days, hours off the clock, and still had to do high-stress marathons in the field. It wasn’t easy - easier than other cases, but it was still a challenge for me. I had to work hard.
The past couple weeks I worked on a MSJ and response to PFR way ahead of deadlines. For possibly the first time, I did that thing where you do the work so far in advance you can not look at it for a day, and then look at it (to see if I still like it - King Crimson) and see all the errors I couldn’t see when I had been so deeply immersed in the work. I got to make nominal settlement offers knowing the filing was ready in my pocket. I also did a good job - I didn’t pull an old sample and put the new facts in - I started from scratch. I pulled and checked case cites, ensuring old ones were current and pulling new ones from recent issuances by the administrative body I’m resenting the case to. This new filing may be a sample later, but this time I took my developed knowledge and made it good from the start.
I no longer see the end game where my job is easy. Easy now means I know what I’m doing and am confident, and may take shortcuts on the details if forced to, but not without knowing the risks of each. Easy means confident, but not really easy. I don’t mind either. Working hard feels good - it’s the strangest thing.
Or it’s easy? People think I’m respectable and disciplined because I always go t the gym. But I suck at the gym - sure, I get stronger in between injuries. But remember I was going to do cardio? I am still not doing cardo. When I go and lift, I just lift, then stop. Lift, then stop. No cardio, no trudging, no elliptical when I’m done, and no crossfit hoppity dances in between lifts. Pick up. Put down. Go home. It’s also fun - I enjoy being stronger than the person beside me, and I enjoy being respectable with good form next to very strong people. It’s not disciplined that I go - it’s momentum and the fact I enjoy it. It’s easy.
What is lazy?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2016-09-06 05:12 pm (UTC)Does lazy means you'd by default rather do nothing than something?
no subject
Date: 2016-09-06 05:34 pm (UTC)But I used to - my parents used to hate that my default was to sit around the house or watch tv, though lack of friends and fear of being picked on didn't help.
What if you choose easy things to do over hard, but you do choose doing things?