Nothing about nothing
Mar. 22nd, 2011 07:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarzHonestly, I'm waiting for the period where the Japanese crisis is so far back in history that everyone, both Japanese and not, is able to use the story as backdrop for manga and godzilla-esque origin stories.
I just noticed many stocks I nearly bought have been hit by events in the business world, and I'm making bank by not following my half-assed investment strategies.
I'm really comfortable. I'm not being very social and I recognize I need to put effort into being a friend even with, especially with, my friends who are infinitely patient or not-needy themselves. I work, I gym, I go home and like last night - read the economist and then watch RuPaul's drag race repeats. I don't call anyone or text. I have a couple friends I need to re-coffee/dinner before they think I don't love them or forget they love me.
LOVE ME (Latin queen stomp stomp) LOOOOOVE MEEEEE!!! (stompy stompity stomp stomp)
I think I've developed a bias, a reasonable one, towards friends who are sympathetic to my irrational feelings. You almost want to have some crazies as a screening device. If friends never criticize or take all your crazies without comment, they might be friends but there is a good chance they're stupid, using you for something, or batshit themselves. Worse perhaps, is when they don't care about your feelings at all. I mean I like criticism, eventually, and growing from it - but just ignoring the things you don't agree with just makes you a business associate and not a friend.
Wish I could think of examples other than fucking ex's. Many of my ex's are ex's of friends of mine. Often the difference in circumstance of whether that went well or led to social disintegration was whether questions were asked, permissions, or sensitivity was shown (not to be confused with hiding shit - not a friend - really easy). Not that I have a spotless record on ANY of those issues, but it's not for a lack of trying. Trying counts, at least to me. Still, I worry that I'm a bad friend to people I care about in the same behavioral way I am to people I know suck and I just avoid. Nobody is a mind reader. Talking good. Talking more important when we're not re-engaging like bonobos in various permutations as life responsibilities, understanding of likely consequences, and health incompatibilities (or awareness thereof) increase with experience.
I realized I was doing 5/3/1 wrong, so I am revamping the program a little. More lifting for shorter periods, unless those light sets at the end wind up taking more time than the support work I was doing previously. It's kind of fun having strength goals and realizing I have no real reason for them. My gf doesn't care, people who care JUST about hot bodies aren't often compatible with me (they usually just like big, and mix in tall, plus they're douches), and strength past a certain point is almost silly in a fight - and I'm not in fight training. I guess fitness is just a weird hobby - one that makes me utter hotness and yields eternal life. Other than that, no real benefit.
I just noticed many stocks I nearly bought have been hit by events in the business world, and I'm making bank by not following my half-assed investment strategies.
I'm really comfortable. I'm not being very social and I recognize I need to put effort into being a friend even with, especially with, my friends who are infinitely patient or not-needy themselves. I work, I gym, I go home and like last night - read the economist and then watch RuPaul's drag race repeats. I don't call anyone or text. I have a couple friends I need to re-coffee/dinner before they think I don't love them or forget they love me.
LOVE ME (Latin queen stomp stomp) LOOOOOVE MEEEEE!!! (stompy stompity stomp stomp)
I think I've developed a bias, a reasonable one, towards friends who are sympathetic to my irrational feelings. You almost want to have some crazies as a screening device. If friends never criticize or take all your crazies without comment, they might be friends but there is a good chance they're stupid, using you for something, or batshit themselves. Worse perhaps, is when they don't care about your feelings at all. I mean I like criticism, eventually, and growing from it - but just ignoring the things you don't agree with just makes you a business associate and not a friend.
Wish I could think of examples other than fucking ex's. Many of my ex's are ex's of friends of mine. Often the difference in circumstance of whether that went well or led to social disintegration was whether questions were asked, permissions, or sensitivity was shown (not to be confused with hiding shit - not a friend - really easy). Not that I have a spotless record on ANY of those issues, but it's not for a lack of trying. Trying counts, at least to me. Still, I worry that I'm a bad friend to people I care about in the same behavioral way I am to people I know suck and I just avoid. Nobody is a mind reader. Talking good. Talking more important when we're not re-engaging like bonobos in various permutations as life responsibilities, understanding of likely consequences, and health incompatibilities (or awareness thereof) increase with experience.
I realized I was doing 5/3/1 wrong, so I am revamping the program a little. More lifting for shorter periods, unless those light sets at the end wind up taking more time than the support work I was doing previously. It's kind of fun having strength goals and realizing I have no real reason for them. My gf doesn't care, people who care JUST about hot bodies aren't often compatible with me (they usually just like big, and mix in tall, plus they're douches), and strength past a certain point is almost silly in a fight - and I'm not in fight training. I guess fitness is just a weird hobby - one that makes me utter hotness and yields eternal life. Other than that, no real benefit.
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no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 11:39 am (UTC)2) sometimes friends do not have the time to comment or call you on your bullshit when you most need them to because they are juggling their own cascades of shit.
3) sometimes friends don't call you on your batshit because they haven't seen you to hear the tone in your voice or see the quiver in your body language, and therefore do not realize it isn't a momentary-between-truffles flare of queen-drama.
now, about that "eternal life" thing -- your Golds must have something mine doesn't.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 11:46 am (UTC)and perhaps I shouldn't watch RuPaul every night before bed like a sedative...
1) I'm trying to also moderate what I do to be healthy but not long-term damaging because long-term is well...now and soon unlike an immortal 20 something
2&3) fair enough, I was thinking more local and phonable vs. online - online many have dumbed down to fb, but nobody seems to take fb interaction seriously
no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 12:08 pm (UTC)A friend of mine died last Friday -- his partner informed people via FB. To be fair, he was exhausted after dealing with the health issues in steep decline for 2-3 weeks, and FB could hit the most people, but anyone (a) not on his immediate iPhone circle or (b) not on FB had no idea of the decline and death.
Less serious, though an index for contact, is that so few are posting on LJ in relation to even 3 years ago. On the one hand FB has taken a lot of the lamest crap and crammed into into twitter-like status posts. On the other hand, the "ease" of FB has meant that many do not sit down and actually communicate complete thoughts. It took 25 years, but FB has enabled the Max Headroom "Blitvert" (or was it blitzvert?) -- but a lot of the "public sphere" discourse has dropped.
One of the benefits of f2f communication is that you *must* answer the question, or state your case, or ask for clarification right then and there. Online one can ignore, avoid, or allow a topic to lapse with no real resolution. (If Ray Bradbury hated TV, I wonder what his response to FB and YouTube are...)
Health: I'm trying to lift more, but I've got two chronic irritations (shoulder and lower back) that get in the way. On top of that, my Golds is all about upselling their contractors (trainers) so many of their staff have no idea how to do a move correctly, nor even how to set the bloody machines when it isn't immediately obvious to a six-year old. Right now my local franchises are all about this stupid "TRX Suspension Training."
no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 12:16 pm (UTC)Wow, sickness and death in fb. I can understand, but also the ramifications of not reaching out are huge. Ouch.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 03:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 03:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 05:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 05:53 pm (UTC)