![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarzJust as I was settling into my job, and fighting the urge to do something more meaningful here or move up the ladder, this budget crisis has stirred up some memories, feelings, and new information about my position to call everything into question again.
I chose to work for the gummint - well I didn't choose it. I was looking for a job after grad school, was striking out all over (it was 1994 and you actually had to read newspapers - there was no job-internet at the time, kids) when I got a call from a government agency. I took a pay cut to start as a GS-7 at 24,400 a year (1995) when I was making probably around 30k with overtime in a factory / copy shop (industrial, not kinkos). Shortly after starting, I decided to retire federal. I thought I would work to a GS-11 and then just coast and retire. I decided while the money wasn't great, it was reasonable and livable, and the hours allowed me to enjoy my lifestyle. Also, I was able to keep my long hair and dye it colors. I encouraged others to work in the government for less money but more reasonable hours and ability to have a personal life.
Now I consider my salary "normal," and myself underpaid. Since I went to law school, this change of opinion is reasonable given the salaries of attorneys in my area, but it's worth remembering I never expected to go above a GS-11 (then 12, now 14 or 15 depending on how you count).
I need to keep remembering I have always worked to find a way that my efforts would get higher rewards. I'm not above revisiting the assumptions or choices I made, but time and again I have tried to put in effort and sacrifice first - to reap rewards later, even modest rewards. I eat my vegetables before desert, and scoop out the cake to indulge in the icing last.
I have viewed getting up to speed at my present job in terms of making it easy to do. Now, I have reasons (rumors, things I won't share) to believe that my job might realistically disappear in the next year to 3-5. I'm an adult lifespan away from retirement, so this is a big deal. I may again find I waslucky smart I went to law school as the degree is more marketable than my MA in I/O Psyc. It means I can't just rest on my laurels and pretend this one facet of law is where I can dwindle my days coasting.
I want to coast, I really do.
I also have the urge to make changes - I see so many things I could improve in my division and the path up is so clear...but I don't know if that is a good option for me. Not only does it require a great deal of sacrifice for rewards I don't need (I don't even live at my present income level, hence my accumulated savings) but joining mgt may actually hamper my employability outside the gummint since my law practice is more portable and applicable. I think, hope.
I am still kind of freaked out by how normal it is to live at your income level. I see others do it and if they have rich parents I feel envy; if they don't I wonder if they will cry victim or act surprised when something goes wrong and their life is wrecked.
I'm just thinking - I may need to take steps to ensure my ability to move job-wise, even geography wise, depending on what happens with government and the economy generally. I'm choosing not to eye management at this time, but not closing that as an option. I need to get my head out of my ass and research some bar and other state bar waiver issues. I really need to continue to determine what I chose and why, what to choose today, what my stated priorities are compared to how I feel today, revisit my choices and priorities to ensure I'm doing what is in my own best long-term interest - and continue to make choices that keep the most alternatives open for a changing environment.
God I sound like a wishy-washy corporate mission statement.
I chose to work for the gummint - well I didn't choose it. I was looking for a job after grad school, was striking out all over (it was 1994 and you actually had to read newspapers - there was no job-internet at the time, kids) when I got a call from a government agency. I took a pay cut to start as a GS-7 at 24,400 a year (1995) when I was making probably around 30k with overtime in a factory / copy shop (industrial, not kinkos). Shortly after starting, I decided to retire federal. I thought I would work to a GS-11 and then just coast and retire. I decided while the money wasn't great, it was reasonable and livable, and the hours allowed me to enjoy my lifestyle. Also, I was able to keep my long hair and dye it colors. I encouraged others to work in the government for less money but more reasonable hours and ability to have a personal life.
Now I consider my salary "normal," and myself underpaid. Since I went to law school, this change of opinion is reasonable given the salaries of attorneys in my area, but it's worth remembering I never expected to go above a GS-11 (then 12, now 14 or 15 depending on how you count).
I need to keep remembering I have always worked to find a way that my efforts would get higher rewards. I'm not above revisiting the assumptions or choices I made, but time and again I have tried to put in effort and sacrifice first - to reap rewards later, even modest rewards. I eat my vegetables before desert, and scoop out the cake to indulge in the icing last.
I have viewed getting up to speed at my present job in terms of making it easy to do. Now, I have reasons (rumors, things I won't share) to believe that my job might realistically disappear in the next year to 3-5. I'm an adult lifespan away from retirement, so this is a big deal. I may again find I was
I want to coast, I really do.
I also have the urge to make changes - I see so many things I could improve in my division and the path up is so clear...but I don't know if that is a good option for me. Not only does it require a great deal of sacrifice for rewards I don't need (I don't even live at my present income level, hence my accumulated savings) but joining mgt may actually hamper my employability outside the gummint since my law practice is more portable and applicable. I think, hope.
I am still kind of freaked out by how normal it is to live at your income level. I see others do it and if they have rich parents I feel envy; if they don't I wonder if they will cry victim or act surprised when something goes wrong and their life is wrecked.
I'm just thinking - I may need to take steps to ensure my ability to move job-wise, even geography wise, depending on what happens with government and the economy generally. I'm choosing not to eye management at this time, but not closing that as an option. I need to get my head out of my ass and research some bar and other state bar waiver issues. I really need to continue to determine what I chose and why, what to choose today, what my stated priorities are compared to how I feel today, revisit my choices and priorities to ensure I'm doing what is in my own best long-term interest - and continue to make choices that keep the most alternatives open for a changing environment.
God I sound like a wishy-washy corporate mission statement.
