(no subject)
Jul. 6th, 2005 09:00 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
vicarzI feel much better today.
I start to feel a touch of sadness that I'm spending my "vacation" writing a paper, but then I have to remind myself that I goofed off for many hours on saturday, shopping for groceries, working out, and hitting the cocktail party. Sunday I worked a little, then spent the rest of the time in restaruants and in the woods. Monday I also did errands and ate out, and despite my intentions ran out and had fun with friends. The only day I really sunk myself into the work was Tuesday, and then I spent a couple hours talking to a friend, did my homework for the regular class, and only then started my paper until I got absorbed in an episode of Monster Garage. So for all my bitching, the only problem was my worry - the activities are exactly what I would have chosen w/o the impending doom.
Last night the prof gave me feedback on my paper - all positive! I have moved from flailing pointlessly to realizing that all the flailing has actually crystalized my knowledge of the subject to the point that I now just have to work. I don't mind working, it was not knowing where to put my efforts that scared me. So now it's just a question of putting the hours in and slugging through it - now rather than later, so I can submit my work for additional revisions. I also noted that many in the class were still addressing selecting a topic to write about.
Now I just have to plug away at it, rather than scanning my email and LJ...oops...so I can enjoy the upcoming weekend. Then, sink or swim, I have 3-4 weeks with no school of any type, just my vacation of only having to work 40 hours a week.
I start to feel a touch of sadness that I'm spending my "vacation" writing a paper, but then I have to remind myself that I goofed off for many hours on saturday, shopping for groceries, working out, and hitting the cocktail party. Sunday I worked a little, then spent the rest of the time in restaruants and in the woods. Monday I also did errands and ate out, and despite my intentions ran out and had fun with friends. The only day I really sunk myself into the work was Tuesday, and then I spent a couple hours talking to a friend, did my homework for the regular class, and only then started my paper until I got absorbed in an episode of Monster Garage. So for all my bitching, the only problem was my worry - the activities are exactly what I would have chosen w/o the impending doom.
Last night the prof gave me feedback on my paper - all positive! I have moved from flailing pointlessly to realizing that all the flailing has actually crystalized my knowledge of the subject to the point that I now just have to work. I don't mind working, it was not knowing where to put my efforts that scared me. So now it's just a question of putting the hours in and slugging through it - now rather than later, so I can submit my work for additional revisions. I also noted that many in the class were still addressing selecting a topic to write about.
Now I just have to plug away at it, rather than scanning my email and LJ...oops...so I can enjoy the upcoming weekend. Then, sink or swim, I have 3-4 weeks with no school of any type, just my vacation of only having to work 40 hours a week.
