Losers like me

I wonder if my love affair with grunge is born in part by my stoner roommates in the 90s. A curious love affair where I liked them, but also hated being the house mom who kept the bills paid and some chores done. I was also filthy jealous - they generally had girlfriends, friends, and seemed comfortable. I rarely had a girl, though my interest was known. I mean I also came out around then, but it wasn't really relevant. I was single. I was friends with them, but as a roommate friend. We didn't stay in touch when the house split up. I was a graduation ahead of them but didn't seem any more put together - just older.

I found this song I used to listen to on the way back from El's. Never really thought of it as grunge. I was relieved to risking the lyric look-up to find the lyrics weren't offensive or completely stupid. That time of my life has passed. I was unhappy and had some key confidants I turned to, a lot, and spent a lot of time buried in my own emotions. Unhappy but consoled.

Mmm I want to drink and dance.

I'm too fucking old - nobody cares. When I was young and nobody cared. It was just because I was some kind of loser. Never fit in. Now I'm just old.