Yes, there is a lot of avoidance which is probably why some people don't write back. You can't be both picky and desperate... but I don't know about facing reality. Very few of us are capable of facing failure or rejection, even though that's how we become better people and grow.

There's really no easy answer to it, but at least some people can sleep more soundly knowing they "tried", or that their justification of there being "no good [potential mates] in this city" is supposedly sound.

One of the women I met at the first dating event said something like there were no guys there for her and wished me luck, saying she may see me at the next one. I thought that was pretty damn silly, but some people are like that. The shame of it is I had a better conversation after the dates.