(no subject)

Hello 4:30 not sleeping: got another ticket from DC gov, which appears to be filed the day they received my appeal of the last one. Contractor nonresponsive, gave deadline of today to resolve ticket issue, tomorrow to have plan to finish. Expenses of litigation and paying for construction investigation and plan to complete job, including whether anything needs to be destroyed and redone, looming. And it's not like my job goes away in the interim, and I still can't lift weights and face random pain...that keeps me up at night.

At the point if I could sell the house and walk I would. I've literally spent my life savings on this and perhaps halfed the value. All those years of fixing my own car, walking to work, making and eating beans and rice while others bought ipods.

Also more failures attributable to not doing adequate research. I didn't know you should have lawyers review contracts. How is this possible.

Even when I don't get injured my body makes up injuries to keep me from being successful at anything.

(no subject)

Tried the gym and I have serious problems. Even warming up, I started to jump up and down and it hurt my ribcage. I did light squats and my arm and fingers tingled. I tried light overhead press and it felt odd but went up...perhaps uneven. Then I tried pull-ups and went up at an angle, as my left arm didn't pull.

I can't jump up and down, and that's to say I can't run - or shouldn't run - as just bouncing makes my back feel like it's pulling on my nerves across my shoulder, back, and down my arm.

Just like last time I had nerve damage, the muscle isn't firing or working under control. I'm not sure who to check in with - GP? Ortho again? I can email the ortho and he'll probably respond. I could also just go light a couple weeks and see if I get better in a few weeks.

I'm not in immediate pain (that would be cute if I returned to extreme pain too) but I'm completely fucked.